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i have a nice, huge corner office here at work.  unfortunately, i share it with 2 other women.  i'm apparently not important enough to have my own office.  so, let me tell you about the 2 ladies i am stuck in a room with for 8 hours a day.  one, we will from this point refer to as "Hacky."  Hacky is a lady in her late 50's, but she looks about 83 because she smokes 3 packs a day.  we call her Hacky because she coughs ALL. DAY. LONG. and it sounds like she is literally hacking up her lungs.  she only got this job because at the time, her sister was shacking up with the director of this department. (side note: the director is also a 50 something year old woman.  ewe.)  anyway, she has no qualifications, no schooling, no skill, etc.  so, i basically get to pick up all her slack.  and let me tell you.... there is a lot.  she never comes to work on time, and it's a given that every monday - she will be at least an hour late.  does she get repremanded for this?  NO.  she just gets to show up whenever she wants, take cigarette breaks at least 8 times a day, and does whatever work she feels is sufficient.  she is always behind, and she has less work than all of us.  arrggh. now, to Chompy.  We call her Chompy because she has one of those 64oz mugs from the gas station at her desk, and it's filled with ice.  (She also continuously has an economy size bag of pork rhinds at her disposal, but that's another story all in itself.)  All you hear from that side of the room is "chomp chomp" ALL. DAY. LONG.  Chompy is the mother of 2 girls who are my age, and are still sucking on their mamas titties.  They cannot make a decision as to what shoes they are going to wear without consulting her.  When they call, she starts talking baby talk to them..... I am not kidding.  Her voice tone raises about 3 octaves, and after every statement or question she ends it with "honey, baby, or sweetie."  ICK.  it's enough to make a girl puke.  on to the matter at hand.  chompy has a severe problem with excessive talking.  i have learned to not even open the door for her babbling, so i dont even say good morning if i can avoid it.  i have never seen anything like it.  she always has something to say, has done everything you've done, and she's done it better.  you know the type.  yesterday, i am having a conversation with my supervisor... not once did we ask her opinion, or even acknowledge her existance... but she still managed to jump out of her chair and hightail it to my end of the office ... trying desperately to take over the conversation. yesterday, i tried a new tactic....rather than just pretending to listen, while nodding and smiling, all the while thinking in my head "WILL YOU PLEASE SHUT THE F*&K UP?!?!?  NO ONE CARES!"  yesterday, i did something i rarely do -- i cut her off mid-sentence and started talking to my supervisor again.  SHE JUST KEPT TALKING.  i kid you not, she continued to babble even when it was obvious that no one was listening.  so, i reached over to my phone (which was out of her view) and dialed her extension.  she did just what i expected, and ran over to her phone.  i thought, surely, she'd stay over there knowing she wasn't really welcome here on the east side, but noOooOO.... when she realized no one was on the other end of the line, she came right back and started where she had left off.  and she wonders why her husband never pays attention to her.....